Is it just me...

... that thinks it's a bit racist when at the end of "Star Wars episode IV: A New Hope" during that whole awards ceremony thing, there are only humans at the ceremony? If you look at the rows and rows of people behind Han, Luke and Chewie as they accept their Medals of Honor, there isn't a single non-human there. Chewie was the only wookie there or non-human of any type.

I'm trying but I'm struggling to think of a reason for it because I can tell you now that the humans weren't the only ones fighting for the rebel alliance. There were Mon Calamari, Bothans, Sullustans and Twi'leks who were also part of the rebellion, not to mention Wookies but for some reason don't get a mention. It's terrible! I mean, putting aside Luke being the blonde haired, blue eyed Nazi poster boy that he is there's something just a bit up with that!

There is also evidence of racial discrimination from the evil empire, but you would expect that with it being an "evil empire" per say. Now I know a lot of you will have already heard these before, but this could be another reason for the whole Death Star conspiracy theory. For those of you behind, read this, for those of you who know, you can skip a bit if you want.

The whole Death Star conspiracy thing goes like this: the Death Star is thought by some to have been an inside job for a couple of reasons. If you watch the Battle of Yavin you'll see that there are only a handfull of pilots and despite the lengthy "Red Leader standing by" sequence, for the amount of fighters it would have taken to blow up the Death Star, there aren't nearly enough. There would have been too few targets that would have all just have been whiped out when they were just getting close, not to mention that trench.

Another reason would be that there's the whole business with the Rebel base being on the Yavin 4, a moon orbitting around Yavin. They wait for the chance to blow it up once it's come out from behind Yavin... So they've got a laser with the capabilities of blowing up a planet, so they wait for the rebel base (while they're short on time and being blown up and that) to come out from behind Yavin (a planet that the Death Star should be able to destroy) so they can blow up the moon. You could say that they would have had to have recharged the laser which I agree they would have but to be fair, they're sat up there for a while even before the rebels come and blow them up. Even still, the debris from Yavin would have fucked up Yavin 4 really quite badly.

So generally, they're expecting us to believe that they could have likely pulled this off? That they just so happened to survive getting as close to the Death Star, the most prized weapon of the Empire? And that the guy who blew it up was no less than the son of the guy who was in charge at the time? That said guy who was in charge was one of the very few people who survived the attack? We all know Darth Vadar had ambitions for Darth Sidius's power. Working against him, even if it meant working with the rebels could bring him that step closer to that power. It works for the rebels because they're not only gaining a grand military victory, which will no doubt be used for alliance propaganda, but they also may see eye to eye on the non human front and could have been at the beginnings of raising a master race.

This could also be the reason of Lando's "betrayal" on Cloud City. Perhaps Han was close to cracking and telling his side of the story of what really happened. Han gets frozen in carbonite to keep him quiet and even though his soon to be lover Leia Organa convinced her brother to help rescue him from Jabba's palace, they were certain he wouldn't speak. Not now atleast. He can just consider himself safe with him being a human, he just has to worry about his good friend Chewie... let's hope he doesn't get hit by a moon or anything... >.<

Great Fan Fiction... Or Greatest?

During the Mandalorian war, Celeste Morne attained the Karness Muur talisman she gets Zayne Carrick to put her into stasis while he was doing so to Dave Lister because he brought a cat on board the mining ship Red Dwarf.

Soon after her being put to sleep for the next couple of hundred years Philip J. Fry comes to deliver a pizza and gets caught in one of the freezing pods and leaves King Herod without a pizza making him mad and therefor he killed all them little children, after helping Jesus stay alive for 24 hours Jack Bauer needed to negotiate a hostage situation with Bowser (despite later finding out that the princess was in another castle) and it was up to Link, the hero of time, to stop Horus Heresy from catching Malcolm Reynolds and his crew aboard Serenity.

As reward for his heroic acts, Jesus uses his force powers to send Link back in time to make sure his parents get together so that he can be born and play guitar. This guitar playing was the inspiration for the Wild Stallions who not only gave rock and roll to you but also made Greedo stop when he shot first letting Han Solo shoot Greedo and get on the Millenium Falcon. This allowed them to fight off Sephiroth so that he wouldn't stop Logan from being fused with adamantian so that he could foil skynet's plans to kill John Conner.

Meanwhile, on Tatooine, Taarna battled with the Klingons to destroy the Locnar which gave her the position of Spectre. However she lost the position after losing a guitar battle with Clive Winston who spent his entire live training in the arts of guitar hero and as Qui-Gon said "he can see notes before they come, that's a jedi traight." The victory helped them get the parts they needed for their ship so they could get to Coruscant where Jack of Blades had all but destroyed the guild but was killed before you could say Balverine. After coming back as a dragon he was again killed by a passing Blastoise who not only had the type advantage but a lot of health potions and ressurection phials.

The effects of Jack of Blades weren't to go unnoticed but once again, England prevails! There was however a lot of crime and cover ups and the like until V blew up the death star again before it could be rebuilt (again) leaving Cade Skywalker to do other things... like Deliah Blue. Xenu, the final evolution of Natu and Xatu, then has a fight with Doctor Manhattan but used self destruct before Nappa could catch him. Nappa, being very dissappointed with this, teams up with Vegeta to go and fight Piccolo, Gohan, Krillin and that lot before being faced with Goku, who had a power level of... wait for it... OVER 9000!!!!

Goku proceeded to Kamehameha them both, but it was so powerful that it opened up a rift between realities, a reality where Ganondorf hadn't been sealed in the sacred realm and with his apprentice Darth Maul tried to take over mushroom kingdom using the power of the dark side and Macgyver's super powered mega lazers that he made out of a paper clip, 3 bowling shoes, a staple and a mauve helmet. Neil Buchanan says "here's one I made earlier." Eventually they overthrew King Kong from power which enabled them to turn the land pretty much inside out and back to front in search of the Dark Crystal. What they didn't anticipate however is that Peter Petrelli was guarding the Dark Crystal while he was in exile on the swamp planet Degobah.

He came accross the Dark Crystal when on a quest with Rodin (the crime solvin', rank eleven paladin) to end the threat of the side scrolling space invaders. They were unsuccessful because despite their best efforts and major victories, they could never gun down the last one and therefor were rendered defenseless and retreated into exile where he found the Dark Crystal. He realised it's power and vowed to protect it from the wrong hands.

Find out more next time on "GREAT FAN FICTION... OR GREATEST?"